Well, here is a list of some basic things mentally strong people don't do. You would be surprised if you incorporate in your daily life these tips for breaking the cycle of negative thinking!
MENTALLY STRONG PEOPLE:
1)THEY DON'T FEEL SORRY FOR THEMSELVES
Feeling sorry for yourself requires a lot of mental energy and won't change the situation. If you allow it to take hold, self-pity will ignite a flurry of negative emotions, increasing the likelihood of failures that breed even more self-pity.
TIP: Change the channel; don't allow yourself to continue thinking that life isn't fair. Instead, sit down and list the people, circumstances and experiences in life that you can be thankful for.
2) THEY DON'T GIVE AWAY THEIR POWER
If you give others the power to determine your self-worth, you will only be as good as someone else's opinion of you. Giving way your power lends itself to helplessness. You will become a passenger in your own life.
TIP: Don't try solving a problem or adressing an issue with someone when you are feeling overly emotional. Instead distract yourself with an activity, like walking or reading, to help you calm down and think more rationally.
3) THEY DON'T SHY AWAY FROM CHANGE
A person who simply keeps things as mundane and low-key as possible isn't likely to experience a rich, full life. Often people put off change. They say things like, "I'll look for a new job when things calm down", but often the 'perfect'time to do something never arises. And the longer it gets delayed, the harder it is to do.
TIP: Start small. Identify one goal to focus on and then establish a realistic expectation for the change you'd like to see in one month's time.
4) THEY DON'T WORRY ABOUT PLEASING EVERYONE
Putting other people first can become a way to feel needed and important. Most of us assume that people-pleasing behaviour proves we are generous, but it isn't always a selfless act; it is actually quite self-centred. It assumes that everyone caes about your every move.
TIP: Ask yourself, "What will I have to give up by saying yes to this?"Before making a decision, recognise wht agreeing to something will mean for you.
5) THEY DO NOT WASTE ENERGY ON THINGS THEY CAN'T CONTROL
Trying to control everything usually starts as a way to manage anxiety. We mistakenly believe that if we try hard enough, everything will turn out the way we want it to. Remind yourself there is a lot you can't control. For example you can host a party, but you can't control whether people have fun.
TIP: Choose to accept your situation. you can acknowledge that your boss is mean or that your mother isn't appove of you. That doesn't mean you can't work towards changing the way they feel about you, but it does mean you can stop trying to force them to be different.
6) THEY DON'T FEAR TAKING CALCULATED RISKS
Taking calculated risks can mean the difference between living a mediocre life and an extraordinary one. Stepping into the unknown-albeit with care-can help you reach your dreams.
TIP: Just like hospitals and governments have disaster-preparedness plans, it can be helpful to create your own. Develop a plan for how you could respond if the worst-case scenario did occur.
7) THEY DON'T DWELL
While self-reflection is healthy, dwelling can be self-destructive, stopping you enjoying the present and planning for the future. Our memories aren't as accurate as we think. Often when we recall unpeasant events, we exaggerate them-and you may imagine that other people were reacting much more negatively than they actually did.
TIP: Create a plan to help you think about something else. For example, whenever you remember that job you didn't get shift your focus to thinking about your next holiday.
8) THEY DON'T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES
The truth is, everyone repeats mistakes sometimes. But if you make the same mistakes again and again the problem won't get solved and you may begin to view yourself as incompetent because you can't get past a certain obstacle.
TIP; It can be helpful to talk to a friend who is willing to hold you accountable and point out your blunders.
9) THEY DO NOT RESENT OTHER PEOPLE'S SUCCESS
Fleeting and occasional jealousy is normal. But resentment is unhealthy and can cause you to behave illogically. If you are always trying to keep up with other people,you will never feel a sense of peace with what you have.
TIP; Stop emphasising your weaknesses. And remember, resentment often derives from exaggerating how great other people are.
10) THEY DON'T GIVE UP
It is difficult to succed without failing even once. Giving up after the first failure can easily become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Each time you quit, you reinforce the idea that faillure is bad, whicj prevents you from trying again.
TIP; Face your fear of failure, and instead think, 'Failure is a sign that I am challenging myself'.'
11) THEY DO NOT FEAR ALONE TIME
For many, the thought of being alone doesn't sound appealing. But creating time to be alone with your thoughts can be a powerful experience.
TIP: Take at least 10 minutes a day to sit quietly by yourself and do nothing but think. Dream about what you want the future to look like.
12) THEY DON'T FEEL LIKE THE WORLD OWES THEM
The belief that you are owed something because of who you are or what you have been through isn't healthy. It can stop you from working hard and it can lead to feelings of bitterness.
TIP: Remind yourself that your problems aren't unique. Although no one else's life is exactly like yours, other people experience the same types of problems, sorrows and tragedies.
13) THEY DO NOT EXPECT IMMEDIATE RESULTS
Success is rarely instant. Twitter's founders spent eight years working o mobile and social products before creating Twitter. Amazon wasn't profitable for the first seven years.
TIP; Avoid placing a time limit on reaching your goal-be flexible. Create short term objectives and celebrate when you reach each milestone.
